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1.All of life is a negotiation. 人生其实就是很多次的谈判。 2.It is a necessary life skill that, sadly, is seldom taught. 这是一种很重要的人生技能，然而，却很少有人教我们。  3.Understanding the psychology behind the negotiations one is likely to face daily is a significant advantage. 了解谈判背后的心理是一个重要的优势。 4.Take anger, for instance. 例如，就拿生气来说。 5.Everyone faces an angry negotiating counterpart at some point. 每个人某个时候都会遇到需要跟一个愤怒的人谈判。  6.Yet few people have strategies in place to manage dealing with such situations with intention. 然而，很少有人有适当的策略来处理这种情况的意图。 7.It’s worth contemplating how one reacts when facing off with an angry person. 当面对一个愤怒的人时，人们的反应是值得思考的。 8.Some people shrink or shy away, avoiding the conflict. 有些人会畏缩或回避，避免冲突。 9.At the other end of the spectrum, some get on their game-face and dish it back. 而另一种极端，则是一些人开始加入愤怒的游戏，进行回击。 10.The ability to reframe how one sees these interactions is a valuable tool in any negotiation toolkit. 在任何谈判的技巧库里，能够重新审视一个人如何看待这些互动这项技能都是非常有用的。 11.Instead of seeing these moments as horrible experiences to endure (or avoid), it’s beneficial to view them as a means to gather information and a means to a successful negotiation outcome. 与其把这些时刻看作是需要忍受(或避免)的可怕经历，不如把它们看作是收集信息和取得成功谈判结果的一种手段。 12.Here are some quick internal and external To Do’s when dealing with an angry person in negotiations. 下面是一些在谈判中与愤怒的人打交道时需要快速处理的内部和外部问题。  一.Internal To Do’s: 一.首先是内在心理层面： （1）Be prepared. （1）做好心理准备。 13.Do the homework, including anticipating how to respond to an angry counterpart and exploring their triggers in advance whenever possible. 要做好功课，包括预测如何应对愤怒的对手，以及在可能的情况下提前探索他们的触发点。 （2）Know the why. （2）知道原因。 14.Knowing your deep why (i.e. what’s driving the issue) can help avert reactivity and keep focus on the outcome. 了解你内心深处的原因(即是什么驱动了这个问题)可以帮助你避免反应，并将注意力集中在结果上。 （3）Self-regulate. （3）自我调整。 15.Avoid responding in kind. 要避免以牙还牙。 16.Take a breath. 深呼吸一下。 17.Consider what is generating the anger in order to respond most appropriately and productively. 思考是什么引发了愤怒，这样才能做出最恰当和有效的回应。 (4)Remain courteous and respectful. (4)保持礼貌和尊重。 18.Rather than getting reactive, treat the other party with dignity and respect, thereby modelling best behaviour and triggering reciprocity. 与其被动回应，不如以尊严和尊重来对待对方，从而树立最佳行为模式并触发互利模式。 （5）Stay focused and calm. （5）保持专注和平静。 19.Don’t allow someone else’s anger to cause you to lose the clarity needed to secure best outcomes. 不要让别人的愤怒使得你也失去冷静，要冷静才能确保最好的结果。 （6）Practice empathy. （6）练习去共情。 20.Seek to understand the other person’s position, their needs (both stated and unstated) and what drives them. 试着去理解对方的立场，他们的需求(包括明确的和未明确的)以及他们的动机。 （7）Separate the person from the problem. （7）把人和事分开来。 21.Avoid personalizing the process. 不要把事情变得针对个人。 22.Stay focused on the issues at hand, and try to bring the discussion back to best ways to get the best outcome. 学会关注眼下的事情，并试图让讨论回归最佳轨道来达到最佳结果。 （8）Know one’s BATNA (Best Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement). （8）了解谈判协议的最佳替代方案(BATNA)。 23.Knowing your alternatives to any negotiated agreement is grounding and provides greater leverage and clarity. 了解任何谈判协议的替代方案是基本的，并可以提供更多筹码，让事态更清晰。  二.External To Do’s:外在需要的事情： （1）Get the other party to agree, i.e. by summarizing their position. （1）让谈判的另一方同意，比如说，先总结一下对方的立场。 （2）Get curious. （2）保持好奇。 （3）Ask questions. （3）问对方问题。 （4）Practice active listening. （4）练习积极地倾听。 24.Put your own needs into the words of the other party. 把你自己的需求站在对方的立场来看。 25.They will want to know what is in it for them. 他们会很想知道他们能得到什么。 （5）Mirror the words of the other party. （5）回应对方的话。 26.Let the other party think they’re in control. 让对方感觉自己是处于掌控之中的。 （7）Invite the other party to show up as the best version of themselves (i.e. when confronted with an angry outburst, say something like: “I know that treating people with dignity and respect is important to you …”). 邀请对方展现自己最好的一面(比如，当你面对愤怒的爆发时，你可以说:“我知道要有尊严、尊重别人对你来说很重要……”)。 (8)Call out inappropriate behaviour, but not in a way so as to trigger a defensive dig-in—allow a face-saver for the other party (i.e. “It seems that you’re upset. Is there something I’ve said or done that’s causing this reaction? What can we do to get back on track?”) 大声说出不恰当的行为，但不要以引发防御性的方式——让对方保住面子(例如:“你看起来很沮丧，但你不知道自己在做什么。”我说了什么或做了什么导致了这种反应吗?我们要怎么做才能回到正轨呢?”) (9)Consider changing the venue—i.e. regroup over lunch or go for a walk together to discuss the matter. 考虑一下改变地点——例如，一起吃午饭或散步来讨论这个问题。 问题 文中出现的句子里你最喜欢的是哪一句？ 留言回复你的答案，前五名朋友可以获得红包奖励哦，赶快来试试吧！ END 留言留下你的微信号 即可获邀加入学习交流宝藏群 感谢关注 跟Amber一起看世界 |
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